Happy Birthday to An Awakened Soul

It was a chance meeting with Dr Subhashini Malik when I as teacher incharge of FCC hostel accompanied a girl in pain to Malik Nursing Home, Balsamand Road, Hisar. I saw the doc anxious and agitated giving piece of mind to a pregnant rural woman who had developed some complication due to utter negligence. She was angry and loud but her concern was  purely intensely human. When our turn came, she apologised for making us wait. I complimented her for her humane ness. She said: my name is Subhashini but I am  kubhashini. That was our first meeting.

Came to know more about her through a friend that she has read scriptures of all dharmas-Gurubani, Vedas, Puranam, Ramayana, Bhagwad Gita and she does six hours 'jap' daily. I was curious. In second meeting I asked her how she managed to do so much 'jap', she said she wanted to check veracity of some saintly person's saying that with one crore mantra jap one can have self revelation.

As chance would have it, I met her three four times during my seven years tenure in Hisar. Annual feature was wishing each other on birthday. When my maiden compilation of poems ' Amaltas' was published I sent her a copy . It was a treat to get a critique on Amaltas in hand written, beautiful, literary letter from her. Sharing of books that followed further enriched me with her generously complimentary missives. In span of almost thirty five years I have met her less than ten times but every time I meet her, her energy level, the aura of a deeply spiritual being, the crystal clear notions and above all her overflowing zeal for learning mesmerised me. She lost her mother at a very early age and is often reminiscent of how courageous her father brought the kids up nurturing in them 'sanskaras' and taste for literature. 

A few years ago the worst tragedy befell her when she lost her only son. In her utter grief, it was unbelievable to see how her spiritual upbringing brought her to terms with traumatic reality. Perhaps all her reading of literature and scriptures, 'jap', meditations had mentally prepared her involuntarily for this irreparable loss and save her from being shattered. 

There are very few people in this world who  have only the positive influence on us possession the ability to love unconditionally. The gifted selves like her are like Sun- givers without expectations. I have often wondered how its always rejuvenating only whenever I am able to connect to her on special occasion like her birthday. A soul like hers is indeed an awakened soul with a purpose of contributing in spread of positivity and human concern. 

Today ie 10th July, she is 77. Happy birthday to you, Mrs Malik.

Let Go...

Two simple, easy to comprehend, understand but are they as simple as a phrase 'let go" ? In Punjabi the equivalent is ' chhaddo jee', 'gall mukao' , 'mittie pao' or simply 'dheela Chhod dena' in hindi.

In spiritual discourses or guided meditations this is the most frequently used phrase 'let go' , take a deep breath, inhale deeply, exhale slowly and let go. Without a let go  there cannot be a 'move on', hence the first and the foremost requirement is to let go. Easy said than done, they say. 

Day in and day out we come across situations which, if taken to heart, can cause havoc. At work place especially, it calls for real good training in letting go or else stress, strain, anxiety, depression are natural corollories just waiting to take hold, seize by neck and overpower. Sometimes it feels like a garbage bin wherein everybody is hurling 'kachra' of negativity, Complaints, grievances, pain, turmoil, illness, depravity, accusations, criticism. But who can afford to be a dumping ground? Sooner than later we have to learn to manage, dispose, channelise, convert the waste to energy, power or be immune to all the negative connotations that the 'kachra' is capable of causing- stink, breathlessness, asphynxia, blood pressure, asthma, migraine et etc. The conversion of negativity to positivity is a herculean task and being immune is not the cup of tea for a sensitive person. 

Having been blessed with immense potential to store, hoarde, keep intact for years together, it becomes difficult for any of us to throw, discard, let off, let go. We keep them safe in our heart, add emotional texture and convert them into memories safe in our heart and provide our brain its remote control to bring them to forefront at the slightest beckoning.Positive things, feelings, words, compliments are short lived and we let them go easily, forget and move on. Somewhere we feel scared to let burdensome thoughts and allied feelings because clinging to them becomes our second nature involuntarily. Its hard to stick to exhortation of 'travel light'. 

The other day my Swimming Coach asked me to let go while I was learning floating without support. I realised that what mattered most was the feel of security- an assurance that I could afford to let go and someone will be there to save me if I start drowning. I was reminded of my maiden attempt in scuba diving where I did let go in deep sea waters mesmerised by the beauteous acqua forms surrounding me and all I had to do was to focus on breathing. Was it simple surety of an oxygen cylinder or my 'desire' to let go in order to inhale the joy that being underwater offered? Once I was one with this feel of letting go, everything became so beautiful, not an iota burden on my mind of whether or not I would go out alive.

Letting go can free us of all cudgels but be it in state of meditation or life, it requires deep faith, trust and courage of conviction. It is as difficult as a surrender and as easy as holding like a child the hand of mother or father and feeling safe, secure, nothing can go wrong-sharnagati. It does mean knowing and believing in someone other than ourselves- human or super human and the constant connect nurtured with utmost care and vigilance. As lesser mortals, we can be weak, vulnerable and underlings but the faith in that 'connect' does not belie. At some point of time or the other we all experience this subtle but sure feel of safety on letting go. The only thing required is making it a way of life. 

I am only trying to learn. Have you-already?